Tag Archives: #Help

Men’s Mental Health- The stigma must be addressed.

Hello, darlings!

Something that I have very much been wanting to speak about for a while, which has been further strengthened after the death of Chester Bennington, yet another wonderful soul that has been lost to mental illness. I myself have nearly lost one or two men in my life who mean the absolute world to me, and if this blog post can even just raise some awareness or give some help to someone, so be it, because no-one should feel imprisoned by society and their mind.

It is a fact that suicide has become the biggest killer in men under 35, and a large factor in this is the stigma attached to men seeking help- Men I know personally have struggled immensely in speaking out and seeking help. Of course, it can be terrifying for women too when it comes to recovery, but figures in recent years have shown that women are much more likely to search for help compared to men. It truly breaks my heart that in our modern day society, there is such a large amount of men suffering in silence, feeling that they have nowhere to turn and when in such isolation in themselves, this can lead to disastrous consequences.

So why are men are less likely to speak out compared to females in our society? I certainly cannot speak for individuals as everyone is different, but there is definitely a stereotype that men need to be strong willed, not showing distress or a cry for help; unfortunately, these stereotypes have been engraved into us over centuries, causing increasing difficulties in modern day society. Regardless, IT NEEDS TO BE ADDRESSED- men deserve so much more emotional and mental health related support. Stereotypes in society have caused men to build a wall within themselves in regards to asking/seeking for help and being able to show distress and sadness.

There is no doubt that improvements are not going to be made overnight;  these stereotypes are difficult to reverse, like with anything to do with mental health, it is going to take time, a spread of awareness and a better network of support in place. HOWEVER, as readers, as advocates, as members of society, as well as relatives and friends of those around you, there is so much you can do!

Spread awareness through writing, speaking up, and reading. Take time out of your day to check on loved ones and if for any reason, you believe they are struggling, talk to them and help them reach a path to get help, whilst also remembering to look after yourself.

Also, if you are reading this and you yourself are struggling with your mental health, I have attached some links at the bottom, there are a range from some that specifically relate to men and some others that relate to everyone.

To all the men out there who may be reading this; dark times in your life will occur and there is absolutely no shame in asking for help and support, whether that be from professionals or loved ones. You are loved and you are most certainly no less of a man for having a mental health issue or even just showing emotion- None of us would be human if we did not have emotions or thoughts, whether they be positive or negative; it is how you get past the difficult times that is important and even though recovery can be terrifying and certainly not linear,  trying to make that progress is something you should be incredibly proud of. Do not underestimate yourself, you are far more worthy and incredible than you may think you are.

Please know that anyone is more than welcome to contact me, whether you know me personally or not.

Until next time,

Rhi. X

Links to mental health organisations- You can also go to your GP or a crisis team for help:

  1. CALM- https://www.thecalmzone.net/
  2. More mental health information/ figures for men- https://uk.movember.com/mens-health/mental-health and https://www.menshealthforum.org.uk/key-data-mental-health
  3. Samaritans- http://www.samaritans.org/
  4. Mind- https://www.mind.org.uk/
Advertisements

Helping someone who is mentally unwell, whilst also looking after yourself.

Hello, lovelies!

As someone who has both mental health issues and knows other people who are in the same situation, I think it is really important for there to be knowledge about how to help people who are struggling. However,  I also believe it is extremely important to be kind to yourself during difficult times like this. Adulthood can be tough and undeniably difficult to know what to do, without causing harm to yourself.

In many circumstances, professionals are needed:

Sometimes, people need more support than just their friends and family; more professional help has to become involved. This does not mean you have failed as a loved one to the person, you just want them to be safe and to help them. The harsh reality is that mental illness cannot be cured completely and can be absolutely terrifying. The majority of you lovely lot that are reading this post are not health professionals and that is completely  okay. If you feel that immediate help or a GP needs to be contacted because you think the person is at risk, you have every right to do so. It is better to contact someone than to risk the situation becoming uncontrollable. At the end of this post, I have linked useful links that you can contact if you are worried!

Try not to blame yourself:

When you are connected with someone who is mentally unwell, it can feel like you are responsible for that person and any relapse that occurs. Many of us can forget that mental illness is vicious and can make anyone feel like they are isolated and drowning at any time; sometimes there are no warning signs. As a loved one; you are doing the best you can and I am sure that the person you are looking out for really appreciates that. It is important to realise that things can happen and if they do, please do not blame yourself because you cannot solve everything!

On that note, there is nothing wrong with taking a step back:

As I mentioned briefly at the start of the post, I have been on both side of the coin regarding mental health. Through my personal experience, I have learnt it is important to take a step back sometimes and look after yourself. Of course you want to be there for the person because you care and do not want them to suffer, but how can you do that fully if you do not look after your own mental health? Taking a step back from the situation allows you to give yourself self-care and love; it also gives you time to think about  if you can go back in that situation and/or if you need to get a professional/someone else involved. There is nothing wrong in doing so. Allow yourself to have your own space.

I found this quite a complicated post to write because I personally find it really difficult to take myself away from situations and people, when I know it is having a negative effect on me. But hey, maybe this will be a learning curb for both me and everyone reading this!

If you are concerned about someone or yourself, here is some important information to be aware of:

Call 999 if you are in need of immediate help.

Call 111 for non-emergency help.

Mind and Samaritans both have helplines which can be contacted if you need help for either yourself or someone else.

Hope this post has been of help or of interest to y’all.

Much love,

Rhi. X